29 Elul: Plan or The year of no excuses

Plans are foiled for lack of counsel, but they are established through many advisers. - 

Misheli (Proverbs) Chapter 15

A man's heart plans his way, but the Lord prepares his step. - Mishlei (Proverbs) Chapter 16

For I know the thoughts that I think about you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. -  Jeremiah Chapter 29

So here we are, one more post for the year 5773 and just before Rosh Hashanah.

For many reasons, it is starting to feel that this is going to be a time of no excuses.  I have made excuses for so long:

I'm not creative, I'm impatient, I am a stay at home mom, I don't have time, I don't have energy, I don't have motivation...

I'm better than excuses.  I want to live a meaningful life, and I also want to live a beautiful life.  I want to feel beautiful and I want to make our home beautiful.

I took a step.  I've decided to stop dressing so frumpy and start making the outside a bit prettier.  I'm going to do the 30 for 30 outfit challenge.

I've also signed up for my Hebrew class which has already started.

I want to read a book a month (this was also last year's goal, time to reset it).

I am going to go to Shul and aim for twice a month.

I've decided to stop just Pinning cute crafts on Pinterest.  I'm actually going to make some of them.  One a month or maybe every second month.  I figure holidays will bring on a couple of extra.  (Or I could be super organized and do them much earlier).

I'm going to use that feeling of my blood boiling as cue.  I am very aware of it, and I know I feel like screaming (and admittedly, sometimes I do), I need to let it go.  I've found the Orange Rhino, which is focused on parenting, but I think can be applied to any reason for losing one's temper.  I will pick ten strategies (she has 100!).

I want to develop my creativity.  I think doing some crafts can help, but I need to work on my own creativity.  I am going to use a journal and a random generator.  I'm not sure if I can do it daily.  Maybe aim for 1-2 a week.  (Maybe that will be my next 30 day challenge hardy har har).

I will go to my JWRP alumni classes and listen to one other lecture a week, whether it's going to my Rebbetzin's class or an online lecture.

I will exercise again.  I'm not sure what that will look like yet, but somehow I will get this body of mine moving.

My list may seem ambitious, the fact is, I AM a stay at home mom with a toddler.  A big chunk of my day is watching my son play.  So maybe sitting with him with crayons and a journal is a good way to spend some of the day.  Or working on a craft.  Or reading 2 pages of a book (or one page!).  My Hebrew class is set for Thursday evenings, after my son goes to bed.  The biggest chunk of time will be the alumni classes, since it's usually 2-3 hours of the evening.  Shul is on Shabbat, and it is better than just sitting at home.  Outfits, well, I do have to get dressed in the morning.

I will be thrilled if I manage even part of any of these goals.  If it means that I've read more books over the course of the year, have a few pages with colour in my journal and a couple of funky crafts decorating the house, it will mean I tried.  I may only make it to Shul once a month and that's ok.  There  may be weeks when I revert back to plain t-shirts/white shells and that's ok too.  They key is to keep trying and reset and refocus when necessary.

I will stop making excuses, get off my tuchus and with G-d's help make some things happen.

Thank you for reading and following along.  Most of the translations for the Torah (Bible) quotes came from Chabad.org.

May the new year be sweet and filled with joy, good health, peace and prosperity.

Shanah Tovah

from http://blogs.rj.org/george/files/2012/09/rh2012-1-george.jpg

21 Elul: Change

And see whether there is any vexatious way about me, and lead me in the way of the world.

Search me out, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my thoughts.  - Tehillim (Psalms) Chapter 139

This writing prompt is one of #blogElul,  set up by Ima on the Bima.  

I'm not good with change.  I let myself fall into a comfortable little rut, and if anything threatens it, I feel my body tense up.  Take, for example, my being unemployed.  The thought of actually leaving the house, my piles of laundry and dishes, freaks me out a little.  

I can't imagine why.  It isn't like I adore doing laundry or emptying the dishwasher.  I guess it boils down to a deeper fear of the unknown.  

In mountain biking, you can ride along a trail, and see what is ahead of you.  If the trail drops suddenly, it is actually good practice to check things out and look for the best line through.  Some people can adjust on the go, keep their weight where it needs to be on the bike...I take less risks that way.  

Oddly enough, I also kind of feel that fear when it comes to improving myself.  Who doesn't want to be a better person?  Of course I do.  These thoughts pop into my head...what if people start to expect more of me and I can't meet follow through?  What if I fail (or fall)?  

I remind myself that it is one day at a time, and one step at a time.  It's ok to make mistakes, and it's ok for people to expect more.  If I am never challenged, I will never improve.  Or change.  

30 for 30 Outfit Challenge - The BackGround

The 30 days of preparing for Elul posts is interrupted by a new challenge....

I am inspired by posts of lovely ladies using 15-30 items in their wardrobe, some including shoes and accessories, and building up a month worth of outfits, never wearing the same one twice.  As a stay at home mom and a Jewish woman who chooses to dress modestly, I end up wearing mostly t-shirts with shells underneath, a simple skirt and a hair covering.  Very little thought goes into any my outfits.

The truth is, most of the time I feel frumpy.  Every Shabbat I go through this crazy process of trying on a bunch of things in my closet and end up unhappy with the way I look.

I lack vision.  My best friend has it.  She can walk through a store, pick out a few things and put together an amazing set of outfits.  I want this vision.

I always made excuses basically repeating, I lack vision and creativity.  This (Jewish) year, that will hopefully change.

I need practice, and what better way to practice than to do a 30 for 30 outfits challenge.  (Wow, this will be the second 30 day adventure, I wonder what else I will do??).

I have gone through my closet and surfed Pinterest Pins that made use of similar pieces.  Feel free to check out my Building my Wardrobe board.  I am also adding some other inspiring outfits for future purchases.

Since I'm not meaning for my blog to become a fashion blog (Oh G-d, for whoever thinks THAT is a good idea!!) I will likely only post a week's worth of outfits at a time.

My goal during the challenge is to not wear  any outfit twice (which means I guess I better do a good job keeping track).  Since I am rebuilding my wardrobe, I can't promise I won't buy anything new (but it won't get used during the challenge).  There are a few things I would like to get, like black boots, brown boots, and I need accessories of various kinds.  Value Village is awesome (and cheap) and Ardene has a ton of accessories for super cheap.

My goals for taking on this challenge is to learn to jazz up my wardrobe and figure out my personal style (do I have any??).  I have been practicing wearing long lost items in my closet.  Some items were hand me downs (free is good), some items I bought because hey, it looked cool in the store.  I have learned that,  as much as I like orange, it may not be a good colour for me.  I am liking the use of belts on outfits, something I never thought I would ever do.

Since the weather is still warm, it is a bit challenging for me to pick the right 30 items, but I am practicing with a few pieces in my closet.  (Which is why I am aiming for the official start date to be September 1).

My 30 items will include shells, even though they  are a basic requirement as pretty much everything in stores doesn't cover what needs to be covered (elbows and collar bones).  You will notice that my bottoms are only skirts, which is part of the modest "uniform" (I will say I have chosen, as there are many observant women who wear pants and still dress modestly).

I just bought this super cute dress for the High Holidays.  I guess it's something like an a-line shape.  I LOVED it in the store and convinced myself to splurge.  When I put it on today, definitely had the "what was I thinking"moment.  I didn't feel comfortable in it.  I'm not sure if it's the wrong size, or the shape of the dress or the fact that it can't be belted.  Sadly, it's going to get returned.  Bonus, I will use the money to buy something else!  

September is filled with Jewish holidays and Shabbat days, which means 10 days of synagogue worthy outfits.  It will be a challenge to pick items (that I currently own) that can go casual or business formal.  

If you are looking for some inspiration, these ladies are the ones who inspired me:

• Ally at Modestly Fashioned
• MK's Outfit Posts
• Audrey's Putting me Together
• The creator of the 30 for 30 challenge, Kendi

There you have it, a bit of background on my sad wardrobe.  I have 12 more days to pick my 30 items, and acquire some missing elements.

image from http://www.tanvii.com/2010/11/my-picks-30-for-30.html#.UhQYfDnYkUV

14 Elul: Starting

Remember not the first events, and do not meditate over early ones.  Behold I am making a new thing, now it will sprout, now you shall know it; yea I will make a road in the desert, rivers in the wasteland. - Yishayahu Chapter 43

And the Lord said to Abram, "Go forth from your land and from your birthplace and from your father's house, to the land that I will show you. - Genesis Chapter 12

This writing prompt is one from Ima on the Bima's Blog Elul prompts

I mentioned in yesterday's post that I didn't feel like Rosh Hashanah is really a new time of year.  That being said, it is a time to reset and restart.

Interestingly enough, I have started to think about my outside appearance (funny how I also mentioned changes in wardrobe in yesterday's post too).  I have chosen to dress modestly, I can't really say when I started, but here I am wearing only skirts, long sleeves and I started covering my hair a few months ago.

As a stay at home mom, my daily wardrobe consists almost entirely of t-shirts over shells and a skirt and some kind of hair covering.  I spend Shabbat mornings agonizing over the contents of my closet.  I have many pieces I owned before dressing modestly, and while I could throw a shell underneath many of them, I felt a little blah overall with any of my choices.

A while back, in my Pinterest wanderings, I came across travelling for two weeks using nothing but a carry on.  I then somehow discovered this site that describes ways to jazz up the wardrobe you already own.   I noticed there is very little out there relating to modest dress however.  After much searching I found Ally's website and more ideas.

I've started to apply these concepts and I feel like I've opened a whole new world of modest dress.   The last couple of days I didn't wear my t-shirt/shell combo and I felt...different.  Maybe because I dressed more like a grown up, maybe because I focused on making things a little prettier on the outside, the inside felt a bit prettier too.

I have also decided that in September I will attempt some form of 30 for 30 outfit challenge.  This of course closely coincides with Rosh Hashanah (which starts September 4th).

I originally had been trying to find some new outfits for the High Holidays.  I found one pretty dress that I fell in love with (rare) and I decided it would be my splurge (70$ at 50% off).  The rest of my outfits will come from my own closet, wearing them in ways inspired by the links above.  (As someone who didn't grow up with any kind of fashion sense, this is a major step for me).

I guess this year, I will work on the outside as well as on the inside.