11 Elul: Cheshbon HaNefesh

Be not hasty with your spirit to become wroth, for wrath lies in the bosom of fools. - 

Ecclesiastes Chapter 7

My personal thought is that reflection is really more an overview while Cheshbon HaNefesh (Accounting of the Soul) is more specific.

I need to work on my patience.

I need to work on getting frazzled less, taking a breath, saying a prayer and THEN figure things out.

I need to work on being a better mother and wife.

I need to work on letting things go, and enjoying the moment.

I want to add more formal prayer to my day.  (Right now I'm just doing one small piece).

I want to go to Synagogue more often.

I want to do things that are inspiring to others, as other people have inspired me.  I don't want it for honour or awards.  I want to be able to give to the community as others have.  I see this as a responsibility.

I want to learn more.  I haven't listened to as many lectures as I had in the past.  I've signed up for Hebrew classes.  I plan on attending the weekly learning here and I am hoping to get a one on one learning partner as well.

I want to read more.  I seem to remember planning on reading a book a month.  I should get back on that.

I will continue to write in my gratitude journal.

I will continue to do prayers with my son.

I will continue to develop tradition in our family to make Holidays and Shabbat fun and memorable.

I'm sure there is more, but I think I have a good list going here to work on.

10 Elul: Reflection

My L-rd, open my lips, and my mouth shall declare Your praise. - Shmoneh Esrai Prayer

As in water, face answers to face, so is the heart of a man to a man. - Proverbs Chapter 27

Rabbi [Judah HaNassi] would say: Which is the right path for man to choose for himself? Whatever is harmonious for the one who does it, and harmonious for mankind. - Pirkei Avot Chapter 2

Contemplate three things, and you will not come to the hands of transgression: Know what is above from you: a seeing eye, a listening ear, and all your deeds being inscribed in a book                               - Pirkei Avot Chapter 2

Elul is all about reflection and thought.  I am thinking about my relationships with others and with G-d.    I am thinking about my personal and spiritual growth.  I am thinking about whether I feel I am a better person that last year.  I am thinking about the changes I need to make for the new year.  I'm thinking about making Elul a productive time so that Rosh Hashanah is meaningful.

I listened to a lecture by Rabbi Ginsburg and he said something that I found amazing.  He spoke about the line we say as we start the Shmonei Esreh (the first quote above).  In Hebrew, the word for lips, Sfataim, also refers to limits.  We are asking G-d as we start the prayer, to remove the things that limit us so that we can do His work.

I hope G-d will help me to do what I need to do this Elul and help me live up to my potential.